the balloon that you released in air
finally burst
and you know not where the rubber
has landed,

just like that old arrow that he shot into the air
you know not exactly where it fell,

just like the love that i am giving, it shall fall
(not for you, who shivers with its touch)
i better give it to the seagull instead

this love for a fish,
this fish that loves nothing but the sea....

in sleep
my lungs are trees
growing
more leaves

my hands are branches
bearing ripe fruits

my feet are roots
sucking nutrients
from my soiled
bed

falling short of words

from this window
glass i see narra trees

the leaves had fallen
it is cold

i am alone looking carefully at the details
of leafless twigs

branches are dry
barks are cracked

the grasses below are brown
beside the fence two boys are playing hide and seek

cars blue and white and black are parked
in one area like gossiping women

i am alone thinking about some details
falling short of words.

two sentences for the night

let us dance,

shall we make love tonight?

el merengue

Mexican clad horsemen
ladies in long skirts

circle dance, stretching hands
clapping of hands,

horses set free in the tundras
snow melting

at the cafe, a muscular man meets
a very feminine woman,

they talk a while , the woman giggles
the man holds her hands

they go for a walk
and it is getting dark

they go inside a copa cabana
drink wine

the moon is full and appears
sits upon a roof

the man pulls down his trouser
the woman undresses herself

he puts off the light
she closes the window.

cliches, disbelief, pretenses, words to avoid.

a bed of roses
mountain of gold
fountain of youth
shangrila,
magic potion
eternity,
love, martyrdom,
holiness,

charity, openness,
self-giving,

patriotism,
talent,
fidelity,

two glasses of red wine
a red carnation beside it

grapes of wrath
gone with the wind

apostle, crowning glory
sacrifice,

obeisance,
geisha, warrior king,
indulgence

did i imagine someone else that time?

we are here in this abandoned house

let us go inside and find out what is left here

the pillars are still tall and nailed to each other

time did not touch the stairs
perhaps they are so insignificant

there is that bed where we spent the moments of youth
your moans are missing

the head board is dusty and the termites ate the legs

it is uneven now, and to hold itself it leans on the side table

i see you on top of me when my eyes were closed.

revisiting our dreams

even in the room of my dreams
when i invited you in

you are till looking for that
squeaking bed

of long ago, when we were so young
and unrestrained

as the wind that gushes forth
from one window to another

i want to reinvent its softness
all its four legs

but the mistress of my sleep
dislikes it

what we have here are flat
uncatalogued floors

a room without walls
an empty space without stars

words flowed
like some reunited letters lately

the concepts come out
from the mind

still like words, syllables conjoining
there are no images still

i wait, i am waiting, i keep on waiting
like a commuter of a train

perhaps i have expected too much from
you
something graphic
like sun rising from a hill
in the full majesty of its
inborn light

after i have read
everything that you have written for years
following each like
the running ticking seconds
of the hour

i feel so disgusted

stalks without flowers
ladies stuffed like mummies

mountains bald deprived of the
green and yellows

there is a world without
sky and sun and sea and dolphins

a patch of light without
a hue

i want to see those prisms
refractions

interactions of colors inside
the depths of
our souls

perhaps i have expected too much from you
and so i am disgusted

give me your world
i will scatter it with stars tonight.

when you pose beside those flowers
and you tell me

it is spring! it is spring!

and that i should be happy
because it is spring time and all the flowers
are showing
their true colors

i stop right there
it is not actually the beauty that we are
caught inside
the prison of having to stay and
believe and
hold on to life with awe

it is the true colors
that i am stuck with

not even the spring that merely
springs it.

when you say that you love me
i do not really believe you

your hands wrap my neck like
some kind of steel chains

and then you plant a kiss on my hair
there is nothing there that grows

it is like a stone that you hit a bird with
and the bird falls from the branch of a tree

dead on the ground
and then you dismiss it as something

natural, birds die
stone hits.

there is a man inside the cage
but you cannot tell that he is a man
because

by all appearances of it
it has black wings, sharp claws, it is muted
by a beak
it can only sing in syllables
it is wrapped by
shiny feathers

it is a bird, a black bird and by all means
you cannot tell
that it is angry

because it sings.

you want me to make a love poem
i will write one
crisp and sweet
and intentionally true

then you will read it

and then you will ask what do i mean
by those images that
you have seen
but cannot figure out
since some hands come out
from the belly
some eyes are put at the
back of the head

i will not tell you

you have always misunderstood love

me.

the white pigeons
find their home inside
the ceiling of this
house

every night i hear their
moaning sounds

they're like the weeping willows
meeting the winds from the far away mountains

there is a packet of winds
trapped in this room

forming a whirl
soon the walls shall tremble

something must give way
to a storm

lest these windows break
frames dismantled

to give birth to a pair of eyes
that will not flicker when it starts

to stare to the sun
or waver to the salt of the earth

these tongues of the mind
these teething thoughts

as you open the door
i reflect upon the sound
of the banging
when you close it

somehow i must be
in the wrong place

but i am not doing anything.

there is something
in your smile
that hinges beyond
the shape of your
body
your arms
sculpt me
into human
form again
for years i
have been
turned into
a big
stone

god of the
walls
pillar of
my gods

when i look
at you
the world
blooms
into a flower

it is this want
and need

but reason is
a sword
that hits
from one side
of my body
to the other

i do not surrender
i am on my wings now
i am flying away
and you feel nothing
about my leaving

nothing's changed
your world is still
sea, sky, land.

dilemma

it is true
you make
my hands
alive
my heart beats
again
when i see
you
but when
i touch you
i will
be dead.

since i am
grappling in
the dark
and you too
lost inside
this room of
less air
and we are
all alone
trying to figure
out where to
take the
exit
the possibility
is
you may soon
touch me
and i may soon
find you
we are anxious
our fears are like
worms inside
our guts
but if i may soon
hold your hand
and touch your
face and your
body
who knows
if there is a switch
there
where i can
turn on
light
so much light
that will guide us
both
to another
world

find me
who knows i
am a switch myself
who knows
if i also own
light
so much light
untapped
undiscovered

discover me
i am waiting
in fear.

i must have
been a tiger
and yet i
did not know
it until you
hinted that
i have sharper
claws
that i roared
in your silence
that i look
so hungry
and you
are the
innocent prey
i have not really
known it
well until you
decided
to run away from
me.

the night is cold
inside the room
our bodies are colder
our emotions
frozen
and we are
like the cold cuts
of the Lord
served upon a
platter
with no one
picking.

if it is handed
to me,
sincerely, i will
take it,
if you close your
hand
and shake your
head,
and look at me
with a square face,
i will understand,
it is not mine
it is meant for
the other
and he deserves it
better
you see
i am a just man
i give in
to what is higher
i nod my head
and will always be
ready
to leave

in one instant
the thought arrives
as a firefly,
or a flash of light
a lightning by the
window that
misses you
as target
you could have died
you shudder
looking on the other
side of the
world
through your half
closed window

a second
sometimes can be fatal
life often
behaves that
way.

it is the detachment
that makes it more
visible,
one as near as your
heartbeat
becomes too familiar
and where it
could have been love
you mistake
as nothing but
a passing
encounter
until the void comes
expands
you you fall into the
hole that you dig
and only then
that you take a second look
of what just happened
regret fertilized
a mass of cells
and is born.